Don’t let that be you. Make this Valentine’s Day a special time for you and your partner.
You’ve created something amazing together so take a little time to celebrate your achievement and appreciate each other.
But forget spontaneity!
That’s going to be out of the window for quite a while as most new mums have just about enough time to brush their hair and tie it in a hairband, so springing a trip to a fancy restaurant at short notice will go down like a lead balloon.
Spontaneous gestures will need to come with at least 72hrs written notice for quite some time!
You can also be confident that baby will have other ideas to any set times and plans you may make.
Leaving your new addition with a babysitter for the first time or struggling to prepare a romantic dinner at home is baby’s cue to break with all previously well-established patterns of feeding and sleeping, without fail!
The trick, however, is to out manoeuvre baby’s attempts to poop, pee, puke and bawl the romance out of your evening.
So here are our 5 Top Tips to help you win at Baby Vs Romance this Valentine’s Night:
1. Give each other a break.
And we don’t mean pack your other half’s bags and send them off for a weekend at a spa.
Take turns to have a long hot bubbly bath with candles and scented oils while the other half takes over babysitting duties. This may not sound very ‘Us time’ but it’s a real treat for all new parents and can help ensure a relaxing night ahead.
It’s important that the one who is meant to be relaxing can’t hear baby bawling for the duration of their downtime so if little one is fractious and won’t settle, put on some music or stick them in the buggy and take them for a stroll around the block.
2. Order a takeaway.
Creating a culinary masterpiece takes time and effort, so even if you’re a Nigella or a Marco Pierre in the kitchen, every minute spent in the kitchen is time that could be better spent relaxing and pampering yourself or your partner.
Plus, there’ll be a lot less washing up afterwards.
3. Set the table.
When a new baby arrives, we often find ourselves eating on the hoof, shovelling whatever we can find straight out of the fridge and into our mouths, so just setting the table helps to create a calmer and more intimate atmosphere. Set the lights low, add some candles and soft music for a warm and inviting feel.
Facing each other and not the tv or fridge light will certainly make for a much more enjoyable dining experience, unless of course you’ve left baby’s changing mat and sicky dribble cloths at the other end of the table.
Make sure as much baby paraphernalia as possible is out of sight or at least not centre stage, as this is grown-up time.
4. Don’t stress.
If baby doesn’t want to miss the party and is demanding to be a guest, don’t turn it into a battle.
So, sitting down and eating together means one of you is either nursing or taking it in turns to rock little one, isn’t that better than one person spending ages trying to get baby off to sleep in a bedroom, whilst their other half is sat alone staring at a cold takeaway?
Feed each other or cut up food into easily forked or spooned size pieces so dinner doesn’t have to stop or go cold. Work as a team so that nobody is left behind.
5. Don’t abandon your partner for a few extra zz’s.
This sounds like a no-brainer but it can be a real deal breaker.
Don’t go to bed, while your partner is still up doing the last feed, nappy change etc..
Yes, you may be exhausted and have an early start but unload the dishwasher, take the rubbish out, put some washing on, make your other half a hot milky drink but whatever you do, don’t let them think you’ve abandoned them for self-indulgent sleep.
It won’t just be cold feet you’ll be feeling once they eventually make it to bed. There will also be an icy blast from the cold shoulder too.
Plus, there really is nothing more romantic than someone waiting up for you and sharing the burden so if you want your other half to feel special, go to bed together.
In a perfect world, we would be able to unplug babies after bath time and then switch them on again after we’d showered, dressed and eaten breakfast in the morning. Reality is, however, a different story so new parents soon find themselves having to adapt their relationships to fit around new demands on their time and energy but it doesn’t need to be a battle.
Making time for each other is important when a new baby and children come along, not just on special days but throughout the year so why not try building it into your routine until it becomes a natural habit?